Amber Heard said she was ‘terrified’ of being sued again for libel by Johnny Depp in her first interview since the ‘Aquaman’ actress lost her libel case against her ex-husband three years ago weeks in Virginia.
“I took for granted what I assumed was my right to speak, not just what I experienced but what I knew,” the actress said of the affair during a Friday night encounter. with Savannah Guthrie on NBC’s “Dateline.”
“I’m terrified,” Heard added when asked if she was afraid of being chased again by Depp.
“I guess that’s what a libel suit is supposed to do, it’s supposed to take your vote.”
The full interview with Guthrie was released after several teasers were released throughout the week.
Despite the jury ruling earlier this month that Heard, 36, smeared her ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ ex with the abuse allegations, she insisted she stood by ‘every word of his testimony.
In fact, Heard doubled down on allegations that Depp abused her during their ‘ugly’ marriage – and outright accused him of lying after he repeatedly denied her claims on the stand during the six-week trial.
At one point in the interview, Guthrie noted that Depp testified that he never hit Heard during their relationship and that “no woman came forward and said he physically hit them”.
Heard responded by hinting that Depp’s other exes may have been too scared to publicly accuse him of alleged abuse.
“Look what happened to me when I showed up. Would you?” she says.
She then explained her motivation for speaking out publicly after being questioned by Guthrie.
“One thing I can tell you is one thing I’m not is vindictive. There’s no part of me that sees that… That would be a really ugly way to get revenge,” Heard said.
“I am not a good victim, I understand. I am not a sympathetic victim. I’m not a perfect victim, I get it. I am not a saint. I’m not asking anyone to love me,” she said.
“What I learned in this trial is that it’s never going to be good enough,” she said of the jury’s refusal to believe her testimony.
“If you have proof, it was a scheme, it was a hoax. If you don’t have proof, it didn’t happen. If you have a bruise, it’s a fake. If you you don’t have a bruise, then the violence obviously didn’t hurt you. If you’ve told people, then you’re hysterical. If you haven’t told anyone, it hasn’t happened. product.
Heard said she plans to appeal the court’s decision to award Depp more than $10 million in damages and hopes the interview will balance “the very, very real fears of others.” [abuse accusers] may have to show up and express itself”
“I hope it doesn’t have the chilling effect that I fear it may have on other people,” she said.
Heard also admitted that she still “absolutely” loves Depp and has “no bad feelings” towards him.
When asked if there was anything she wished the jury could have seen during the trial, Heard said there were documents from her doctor that “represented years, years of real-time explanations of what was going on”.
“There’s a binder of years of notes dating back to 2011 from the very beginning of my relationship that were taken by my doctor, who I was reporting the abuse to,” Heard said at one point in the interview.
Deadline reviewed the notes in the binders and found that her therapist had written things like “He hit her, threw her on the floor” and “He threw her against a wall and threatened to kill her.”
Heard said she was not confident on the day of the verdict, saying the trial already appeared to have been decided by the opinion court
“I think the majority of this trial took place outside the courtroom, unfortunately. I think a large majority of this trial took place on social media. And I think this trial is an example of that madness,” Heard said, saying the jury must have been swayed by Depp fans at the courthouse and online.
The jury ultimately sided with Depp, due to “relentless testimony from paid employees,” she alleged.
“I don’t blame them. In fact, I get that he’s a beloved character and people feel they know him. He’s a fantastic actor,” she said, while admitting that she should have acknowledged some of her own bad behavior to curry favor with the jury.
“I’ve done and said horrible, regrettable things throughout my relationship,” Heard told Guthrie. “I have so many regrets.”
“You know, Savannah, as stupid as it is to say it out loud…my goal, the only thing I can hope for at this point is that I just want people to see me as a human being.”